Call me irresponsible, call me unreliable

I’ve been away for far too long but I swear I have valid reasons!

I have been feeling uninspired to write about my dating life because well, there has been no life in it to speak of. I have taken a month long break from dating thus far.

Why?

I know I was filled with *so* much enthusiasm about my ability to explore myself in relation to my sexuality and dating a wide variety of men but I just got caught up with one boy, Edward, and this was very silly of me for a variety of reasons.

I don’t want to rehash all the details of how he hurt me (but hurt me he did!) but I am actually quite relieved he hurt me so badly…..

It reminded me that I am in no place to have a serious committed relationship.

The only thing I’m still mourning is the great sex I was having with him towards the end. The best sex of my life! But, I know such a statement hardly has any weight after all, he was only the third person I’ve had sex with.

Just to recap:

The first – my ex-fiance I never wanted to have sex with

The second – my oldest guy friend I spent only one very drunken night with

The third – Edward – “the best sex of my life!”

So, I know such a proclaimation of Edward is not much of a compliment towards him. *wink*

But, after her hurt me, I took a break from dating. I was just too upset. When I would make out with a new boy all I could think of was how he wasn’t Edward and how much I wanted him to be there….

 But I have EXCELLENT news: I have realized I truly am over Edward. I feel so free without him. He made me feel like this empty shell of a person with nothing to offer but really I know it was his problem, not mine, now.

So…..things should prove interesting yet again!

“Call Me Irresponsible” Frank Sinatra

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November 2, 2007. broken heart, Edward, Frank Sinatra, heartbreak, relationship, sex, single. 3 comments.